If you have real concerns about the health of your marriage, here are 7 reasons to begin Marriage Counseling NOW!
1. If you haven’t been able to improve the relationship on your own, it’s time to try something different.
Some people describe insanity as doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. If you’ve tried to change your relationship in many different ways, but keep getting stuck in the same mess, then it’s time to reach out for help from a professional Marriage Therapist. Relationship counseling works best with both people involved, but even individual therapy can change the nature of a relationship.
2. If your relationship needs professional help, now is better than later.
So often couples present for marriage therapy about five years too late. Then the call to a marriage professional is the direct result of one person dropping the “D” word or there’s been an affair. Just like a garden that is not tended will grow out of control or die, a relationship that is not nurtured and cared for properly will most likely deteriorate. Marriages do not take care of themselves. If they are taken for granted or ignored, weeds grow and hurt abounds. Seek help before the weeds take over your relationship garden.
3. You always call a doctor before beginning a new exercise regimen.
Growing and maintaining a healthy relationship is like staying healthy physically. If you want to have a healthy body, then directed and purposeful effort is required to get into and stay in shape physically. Relationships are the same. They must be nurtured, fed and maintained in order to grow. If your marriage is out of shape, seek a marriage expert to help you bring it back to health. Hoping things will get better is not the same as
4. Take advantage of the current crisis to achieve the change you desire.
Going to therapy is an excellent way to transform a current struggle into a new and better relationship. You may have heard that sometimes you take two steps back and one step forward. However, a new step in the right direction can change the dance altogether and for the long run. Once the crisis has passed, couples are less likely to take the brave plunge into counseling, even though the underlying issues are most often not resolved.
5. Ignoring problems does not make them go away.
Sometimes people fear being open about negative feelings will cause irreparable damage to the relationship. But how does hiding true feelings about valid concerns help the marriage? There is a chance these hurts will resolve in time, but at what cost? When it comes to close relationships, open closeness always feels better in the long run. With love, healing is always possible!
6. It’s easier to ride a tricycle than a bicycle.
Tough negative feelings can sometimes add instability to an already strained relationship. A two-wheeled bicycle is not stable if one hasn’t learned how to ride well. Adding a marriage professional to the experience provides a stable third wheel so the couple can learn to navigate difficult issues without too much bruising.
7. Therapy is cheaper than divorce!
If you talk to anyone who’s been through a divorce the cost is much greater than the decree’s bottom line. Ending what was hoped to last a lifetime hurts on so many levels. If something in you says your relationship may not last, please do yourself (and your family) a favor and seek help from a marriage and family therapist today!
How do you choose a marriage therapist?
When looking for a marriage therapist, work to ensure they are either licensed as a Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) by their state OR they have extensive training in working within relationships. Furthermore, when you find a therapist that makes you just slightly uncomfortable, you’ve found a great therapist. Great therapists are more concerned about helping you achieve the change you desire than making you feel good about yourself or creating a safe space for the relationship. They care enough to be honest and help you be honest even if it means you might not come back. Marriage therapy is not for the weak of heart. It requires great courage, strength and tenacity to address difficult issues in the relationship and that doesn’t usually make people feel safe…the point is to help you get stronger.